Update, in which there are some RL concerns

I haven't made an actual post in a while, and these last two weeks have been the reason why. January 9, I was told I had been downsized and Friday the 20th would be my last day, with two weeks severance. This wasn't a position I wanted to stay in my whole life, I run a mailroom and mobility center, but needless to say, I truly enjoy the people there and I wanted to leave on my own terms and with my own timing. Only a few days before I got the news, I had found an incredible new roommate - we ended up talking for three hours that first night we met. Needless to say, along with my job, that evaporated as well.

I've had two interviews thus far, which considering the timing is very good, and I've been handling it well for the most part, but tonight when I got home, knowing I hadn't gotten any other responses to my inquiries, I felt crushed and a little hopeless, and nearly started crying. I talked to my mom, which was a huge comfort, and on my friend jen's advice, made myself the foofiest, rosiest bath ever - a rose bath bead, salts and milk bath. The water was positively pink. I feel better, though I'm not sure how these last two days will be. Thankfully, two of my schools have late deadlines, and so I won't miss those - I just don't have the time or energy to finish the UCSD application right now. I think in a way this could be a very good thing - I should have 'moved on' a long time ago. I shouldn't feel bound to a job just because I enjoy the camraderie, I shouldn't daydream about a better life and not do anything to make it happen.

So if I'm a bit...off..lately, that's why. It's been hard to read, almost impossible to write, though today before I got home, I was in very good spirits. Tonight, after doing a few more applications and sending out some overdue e-mails, I may watch Amelie, it's one of my comfort movies. Just wanted to let everyone here know, and I hope you're all doing well.